Thoughts from Casanova and Francesca

Be the Flame, not the Moth...
-Casanova

Okay maybe this line will apply to me. I remember my close friend Benny telling me that a person who's wanted by someone will most likely be wanted also by a lot of different people. His point was, who wants a person who is not wanted??? But then is it really possible for me to be the FLAME? coz for the past couple of years, I have to admit, I have been the MOTH! The moth to weird guys who have a weird hobby of playing music. hehehe...

Love is not does grow with the number of lovers but will fade away.
-Francesca

I won't be able to attest or defy this for one reason and one reason only. I don't have that much experience yet of being a lover and collecting lovers. I know... In my 22 years of experience, never have been in a serious or non serious relationship.

we're going to have our language training...
to be continued....

Bonding with DAD!

Last night I talked my father into watching a movie with me. Why only my dad? Well because my mom wants to continue reading her novel and my brother is studying...It pays to already be graduate because I was stripped of the part where I had to study for a test. All I have to do is finish my household chores and I can relax after.

Well anyway, I picked out this really cool flick from Video City. Its actually Chinese with an English dubbing. The story line was a typical story but I was really satisfied with the action packed scenes of kung fu and martial arts. And the guy was cute so basically I enjoyed the movie.



But really I was more thankful that me and my dad have a lot more conversations, a lot more moments to bond as father and daughter. We don't usually talk that much but now, he asks for my opinion.
I think it started when my mom left for Tacloban to take care of my dying grand mother. I was running the household and me and my dad were together all the time. He smokes less now and even goes out of the house to smoke unlike before I had to tell him to smoke outside because I cannot breathe anymore.

I'm really happy with my family right now.

As for that guy who stole my heart
please return it back to me
don't be afraid to admit that you feel nothing for me
because I cannot wait forever
for you to be able to tell me to my face
the truth of how you feel.

Remember what I told you
that I value honesty
And it would be better to hurt the person just one time
and tell that person what is true
rather than punish that person
and having that person wait in vain

I'll be doing a volunteer work in the office by giving my spare time encoding data. Well at least we'll be paid even if its just a small incentive but its additional income for me.

I am really satisfied and happy with my work, my team and the company. I am learning more and everyday, I look forward to answering every guests questions and be more challenged with their personality.

Anyway, I'll try not to flood this blog. Its quite long already.

Take care all and God bless.

Taureans' Horoscope for the day:

Take heart! If you've been feeling unfocused or underwhelmed in the recent past, the stars send you something or someone compelling enough to perk up your interest. You might even be intrigued enough to chase 'em.

I thought I would forget

At the end of the day
My face lights up
As I leave with the people that I felt safe with
I then contemplate on my day
And on those moments I laughed and joked around
I was not thinking of you
I was not even thinking even when my mind went blank
When the gush of wind blew my unruly hair
When the ride drove me to safety
And then just thinking that I was successful
In forgetting you for a day
I then laughed to myself
Here I go again
Like a merry-go-round
Admitting that I was not thinking
But actually you just crossed my mind
It was just that I was not aware
And it led me back to the beginning of things
You. The problem, your heartache, my pain.
The conversation, my laughter, your jokes.
Our stories.
And I remember always.
When there were just the two of us
And all that mattered are the words we've spoken
The songs we've sang
And the time we've spent
Holding to each other's strength
To keep ourselves sane.
I do remember. Always. I won't forget.
Even if its not meant to be...
YOu and me..

When it rains it pours...

It has been one week and 4 days since my grandmother died and 6 days since her very dramatic funeral. She was a strong-willed woman who had her fair share of laughter and tears. But the only inheritance she left for me were her words...Words of wisdom and faith, words which is painful for her children that they didn't bother to share it to their kids. I told my mom, maybe my grandmother's message was not only for them but also for us. Anyway, God bless her soul...

I remember LEXIE asking me: DO YOU FEEL THAT HE LIKES YOU? DO YOU KNOW IF HE CARES?

And I was like: Yeah he does!!!!

Yesterday I went out with my groupie in college. I thought at first it would be a girls day out but then Louise asked if Ian (her boyfriend) and one of my best buds, could tag along because they won't see each other this weekend. Engr. Wilfrid Ian Tan is already one of the faculty members of the Computer Engineering Department of the University of San carlos Technological Center and the faculty are having their team building in Panglao Bohol as this article is written.

We talked about a lot of stuff but mostly about what we did in the past and how much our lives changed since the day of our graduation...

Cathy said we must learn to adapt to the changes and I agreed with her 100%! I mean living life means going with the flow of change. We must learn to find ways to survive and keep up with each other's lives. Cathy's going to Qatar and be a flight attendant. We won't probably see each other for 1 or 2 years. But then I told her, we can always communicate through emails or friendster. I told her, when she gets back we're gonna go to Camiguin and have our vacation there.

Then suddenly I received a text message from my long lost sister: Leslie. She said her boyfriend is going to work in Manila while she'll be stuck here in Cebu. I felt completely sad because it seems that a lot of people are leaving the city to explore their career somewhere else. I felt sad for my sis coz I know that she's used to having her beau around and all but I think she will have to choose to survive this. It would probably do her good considering the fact that she became so dependent on the guy ever since they became a couple. She used to be self-reliant and very independent individual. Now, it seems that she can't live with out him around. Well I hope she's doing okay now. I'll try to hangout with her next week.

During the taxi ride to my Lola's place I realized something:

TO: That guy

Your wounds stopped bleeding
And its now starting to heal
For there's no use for a gauze dressing anymore.
The tears had dried up already
and the poor wounded soul can now once again stand up and say
I am ready to face the world.
My mission has ended...
Should I say I love you then goodbye?

From: This girl

The only way that I could probably tell him how I really feel is for me to say goodbye. And for that to happen is for me to leave this place and go off to a different country where no one knows who I am. And since I think I'll still be stuck here in Cebu for the next 5 years, then I'll keep my silence in bitter tears...

Oh well, from now on I will stop hoping for that magic to happen coz it tires me out!
I can barely breathe with everything else around me happening in less than a speed of sound...

Back to LEXIE'S question...

As of today my answer is: I'm not sure anymore whether he does care or not!!!:(

LOOKING FOR Vanessa!

Lately I've realized that there are still certain aspects that I have that gravely surprises me. I mean I know I've told myself to stop acting on impulse to get myself out of trouble but then there are just those instances wherein, heck, my mind doesn't seem to work and I act right away!

So these are the things I'm trying not to do:

1.)Hold his hand while we are walking
2.)Text him
3.)Call him
4.)Eat icecream or chocolate
5.)Eat Sbarro
6.)check my friendster everyday
7.)think of other people's opinion of ME
8.)day dream
9.)Sleep in the jeepney on the way home
10.) watch too many movies

and so far I'm successful with 1, 3, 5 and 10...the rest, I don't know...hehe...

Yesterday got a good head-knocking from my GYBF(guy bestfriend) Doyle. It was one of those moments when he's the only one that made sense in all the sea of friends I have...If you have read the tags posted on my tagboard doctor Doyle posted something like "you miss you" and when we were chatting during work, I asked if the message was intended for me. He said yes and that I should not be thinking of pleasing other people. I mean don't get me wrong but I'm not trying to please everybody else its just sometimes, I worry myself of what other people are thinking about me. I know, I know... I should not do that to myself! I mean I was sure I know me already. But it doesn't mean that there is no room for improvements right? I mean I have to admit that there are still those tiny bad habbits that always get in the way of somebody else. But for arguments sake, fine I would try to think less of other people's opinion of me and do my own thing in my own terms as long as I won't be hurting somebody else along the way.

I have read Ipay's email and the message sent was:

Effort is important, but knowing where to make an effort in your life makes all the difference..

So its not enough for me to say I did my best but also be able to know when to put in extra effort and when not to...

my horoscope for today:

Are you open-minded enough to accept the truth, or are you stubbornly insisting on your way in the face of all the facts? Make things easier on yourself and go for the first option. Let old expectations go.

How perfect, right?hehe...

I'll be leaving for Tacloban today at 4pm and be back hopefully tomorrow evening. I am happy to go there and meet up with my mom's side of relatives but then still sad to note that we only get together if somebody dies. REALITY BITES!

chill for now!

Random Quiz: by Seventeen.com

Are you ready for a serious relationship?
FULLY COMMITTED!
You're tired of flings and flirtations--you want the real deal! You'd rather work on developing an intense connection with one special person than waste your time with a bunch of different prospects. If you can find a guy that lives up to your expectations, you're ready to commit!




What signals are you sending guys?
The signal you sent is "YOU CAN TALK TO ME"
Your social grace and friendly personality make it relatively easy for guys to approach you. Even if you aren't interested in pursuing more than friendships with the guys you meet, you still treat them with respect—and they appreciate it. Just remember not to overdo it—or some guys may misinterpret your friendliness for something deeper.



Are you unforgettable?
MOST MEMORABLE
For the most part, you make a lasting impression on those you meet. Once in a while, you may act too shy (or come on too strong), but usually you strike the perfect balance between the two. You're not afraid to stand out from the crowd when it really counts—like when you're trying out for a sport or on a job interview. In new social situations, you actively participate in the conversation, giving information about yourself but also asking questions. You're smart enough to know that a big part of being memorable is remembering others. Congratulations!

So if you want to take the quiz, just visit: www.seventeen.com!

By the way, please pray for the soul of my grandmother. She died yesterday morning at age 89! I will surely miss her...

Gone are the days when we sit and talk
Gone are the laughter that brights up the room
Gone is the mentor that taught me about life
What remains is her memory
And it will be kept in my heart
And will forever be hidden there...
To: Mercedes Sabarre-Singson Granados

ILLUSIONS

I had a weird morning...

I woke up thinking that it is already 4:45 am. So I pushed myself out of bed and took a bath...I was kinda shocked why my cellphone's alarm didn't go off at 4:30 am. I finished putting some clothes on, combed my very wet hair and went to the living room and expected to see that it was already 5:15am. Well guess what it was just 3:15am...I was like 2 hours early to go to work. I double checked coz may be the clock in the living room's not working again so I looked at my cellphone and it was really just 3:15am! Ohhh...I was appalled. did it mean that I was sleep walking or that I was just dreaming...I went back to sleep in the coach.

I miss him
I miss his presence beside me
I miss the sound of his laughter
I miss the look on his face when he tries to express how he feels about something
I miss our walks and when his hand brushes on mine
I miss the smell of his perfume
I miss our conversations
I miss his teasing me
I miss our arguments
I just miss him terribly...
bottom line: I'm going crazy!

I really like this actress:



This is Keira Knightly. She's such a versatile actress, she speaks well and she's really pretty...

well, its going to be my day off tomorrow and monday! And I don't have plans yet. so if you want to go out, just give me a ring!

chill!

My CallTek Family

I have been on the floor since May 25, 2006 and so far in spite of the few irate callers, I'm quite loving my job.Why?

*The mere thought of being able to be of help to someone brightens up my day.

*I already feel the sense of belongingness with my team.

*According to my Team leader:Kate, don't limit yourself with the designation that you have right now, learn more and explore all the possibilities.

*Every time the phone rings its like swimming into the unknown and finding out that there is a treasure to be found and that is knowledge beyond the unknown.

*I am now able to help my family, paid for my brother's tuition fee and bought some things of my own.

*I have found new friends, friends whom I feel will be for keeps. =)

Poetry day!

If
by Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream---and not make dreams your master;
If you can think---and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same:.
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build'em up with worn-out tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings,
And never breathe a word about your loss:
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings---nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much:
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And---which is more---you'll be a Man, my son!


my horoscope for today:

Are you aware of how big an impact you make when you enter a room? You should be. The world reflects your burgeoning personal power back at you. Enjoy your charisma and view it as the celestial gift it is.

Random thoughts...

Horoscope for the day!

You have a special bond with someone in a very different age range. You may question how this looks to people on the outside, but in the end, their opinions don't matter. You know how special this relationship is.

I went to school yesterday and took some pictures for our yearbook...Well I was not the one taking the pictures. More like the critique of the shots taken. It was like traveling back to those days wherein my world revolved around school and my friends. Well yesterday was one of the most satisfying days of my life... I get to hang out with one of my most favorite persons in the world! He talked to me about his past relationships, gimmicks, subjects and whatever it is that he did during those days...and I was like a sponge (Spongebob), absorbing all the information I could get, trying to put the pieces together, trying to figure out who this person really is and if my heart would be safe if ever I decide to surrender again!

We talked some more over Kublia's and there I realized that when it comes to view on relationships, we have the same ideas. And I was kinda shocked when he asked me about my past relationships. Well lets just say more like embarrassed of the question since, relationships, serious ones are quite scarce for me. ONly had one relationship when I was 13 or 14! My gosh that was like ages ago.hehehe...Then I asked him if feeling the tingles is the same with feeling happiness with that person. Then he said no, its different coz when you say happiness, what comes along with it is also contentment and satisfaction.

Then I told him about the perception of me being too good to be true and ending up being boring. He said that sometimes its true but when it comes to me, he said I don't have to change anything about myself. He also said that he's past GFs told him that he's too good for them...Huh???You see, I'm not such a party animal...my night life is non-existent with a couple of parties but I rarely go out to clubs and such. I do love to dance, disco and drink but mostly, I feel that its too inconvenient for me to got out. And then I was happy coz he said its okay and that if he didn't have gigs with his band, he'd rather stay home also. He's a family man and I really admire that aspect. Such a plus!

and then he said, we should be glad we were brought up the way we were, with our parents being strict and all. Coz with that we learned to appreciate things and we have our own principles and values.

its really nice to be with him, one of the persons I could open up to with out having to think of what I'll say or do...well except for the part about my true feelings for him. hehehe

and we kinda have this understanding that honesty is really important and we'll try to be honest with each other from now on!

So much for yesterday! I'm having a blast here doing work! Good thing I didn't get an irate guest...hehehe:)



Well till then! Chill...

Taureans' Horoscope for the day!

A tiny gesture goes much farther than a dramatic overstatement. Learn to watch and wait before you act and you'll see the exact moment where you should make your move. Trust yourself to make the right motion.

how can this message be pretty convenient and timely for me...I mean, I have been searching for a sign, from God or from somebody else to give me a very good advice and here comes my horoscope for June 3! hahaha...


Anyway, I watched the movie Domino last night and once again enjoyed the independence and strength of a woman. Domino was a lost soul but she found justice and peace to what she did as a bounty hunter when she did the heist for the operation of a baby girl.
Its really hard to be placed in a situation where in you really need to engage yourself in danger. Anything for a good cause...

Well if you have time, this movie is highly recommended...Action packed and Keira Knightly is really an awesome actress...

Finally tomorrow I get my day off...Rest day!!!

Take care and Godspeed to all!

Krishna askes me if I agree to the saying:

Patience is a Virtue!

Oh well, yes a very difficult virtue to acquire and learn!

I mean, I believe that every person has patience but it all boils down to up to what extent. No matter how much we try to be logical about things, be patient with the situation but we do have limitations. Most especially if people or circumstance test us with utmost annoyance! Its a challenge though on our part, as TSE's...

I had an irate guest today who was already connected but just wanted to air out his concerns. He was getting angry at me for asking too many questions and not saying exactly the same words that he utters. I give him that, he feels that I was not listening. And given that he was already frustrated, my probing got him boiling. And at that moment, I tried to feel what he feels and think of the things I wanted to hear if I was in his shoes. So I repeatedly apologized and admitted that I was wrong in assuming that I did understand him! And when he restated his concern, I repeated everything as how he said it and it kind of eased him a bit. I assured him that his concern will be forwarded to the management!ohh...that was tough! I'm pretty sure that he didn't get to me but he wouldn't hang up. Well anyway, that's over and I'm glad in the end, he didn't hate my gutts!

Well they say that being in a call center is such an easy job! but let me tell you this...being in a call center is a very difficult job! it would test your intelligence, your customer service and alas, your PATIENCE...it will grill you till you get burnt but it would also put a smile to your face knowing that you were able to help...Maybe I am cut out for this...

Maybe all we need is just a little PATIENCE...haha...

I finally had something to write about...something of substance...

Anyway, the day ended again and I am smiling still...

God bless to all!!!