I spent my inevitable lonely Year 2006 Christmas at the CallTek office, taking a call and talking to some lady who had trouble connecting to the wireless internet. I thought I won't be getting a call but then boom, 2 minutes before 12 which was supposedly my meal break, my phone rang and the rest is history. The people around me were greeting each other, there are already fireworks outside and my groupies are having picture taking and I was taking a call... Well at that very moment, I felt like crying. It seems like I'm not part of the festivity. Its supposed to be a happy occassion but then I was there, and look at myself and felt sorry for me. I know sound so lame but Christmas for me is one of the most important family gathering. And for the first time, I wasn't there to distribute the gifts, I wasn't there to organize the games, I wasn't there to watch a movie with my cousins and talk till morning light comes. Times change, and time changed me. I know I will be able to cope with this and then I realized the moment passed by.
And I realized that if we dread something so much or we look forward to it, that moment will not be still, time will not freeze and we do move on.
Merry Christmas darling
tried to give you a ring
actually it was two
but I never got to you
Once again I gave my heart away
to a person who seems to have no interest
and I'm left hanging by a thread
holding my expectations abridge
when will I ever learn
when will I ever stop giving away
what is left of my heart on Christmas?
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