i feel empty

That's what Merideth said in her bathroom talking to Christina when she learned that Derick's wife is in town, let alone working also in the same hospital they were working as interns. I know I watch too much of Grey's Anatomy but I can't help it. I feel like I have to know what's gonna happen next. I don't actually relate to the character's situation but I can surely relate to how they feel.

NOw why in the world do I feel empty?

For one it just occured to me that it has been a month since I quit my job for a more promising career in Accenture, or so I believe. But up to know I still don't have a start date. And because of my total freak out over this and over the million people who kept asking me when I'm going to Manila, I decided to apply for a job here in Cebu. Imagine my dilemma when I called our recruiter in Accenture and confirmed that I am still on this and that they're processing my papers now. As per the recruiter: "Maghintay hintay lang po tayo kase priniprocess pa po namin ang application ninyo...Huwag lang po tayo mainip!" Well I can't blame me for being anxious not having heard from them in weeks after mailing the contract and requirements. I wasn't expecting a phone call but an email could have erased any doubt from my mind that I do have a job in Accenture.---- to make things simpler ---- I AM STILL JOBLESS!

Next reason why I feel empty is that it seems that I have lost that lovely feeling... I don't want to say it out loud because the last time I did that I fell harder than before, ended up eating my own vomit~ imagine that~. I'm trying to assess whether the feeling is still there or not. And what's funny and creepy is that he didn't just appear when I was already in 5th year but he was there since I entered college. I just didn't acknowledge his presence. As I was reading my diary to those times I've already forgotten, a lot of things hit me. There were a lot of could-have-beens but I was such a coward to admit that my dear friend has indeed fallen for me. The moment I realized that I ran away, drift off to another dimension of friends. When I got back to earth, they were still there but once again, that lovely feeling they had for me was gone, gone with the wind! Maybe the next time somebody asks me why I don't have a boyfriend yet I would admit that I wasn't ready yet.

QUESTION IS:

Am I ready now?

nota bene...

to be able to read the continuation of what I like or is looking for in a guy please refer to my FEBRUARY 3 post... I just edited it now...unfortunately it was saved on that day...so...

I can feel the summer heat...

I'm trying to look for another template for my blogspot. I know shame on me, I keep on saying that I will practice Dreamweaver but up to now, I still don't have my own design for my blogspot. Uhh...As what I've told Doyle last night, I'm not an artist by nature. Don't get me wrong, I love art and I know how to appreciate one and got some taste into it but unfortunately for me, nature doesn't connive to my love for art. It didn't give me the skills to create art. But I'll try my very best now that I don't have a job except for doing the habitual house hold chores.


My mom loves me around. She keeps giving me this listed tasks to accomplish in a day... And I do have a list of task from our former or shall I say current (because we won't probably change anymore) president: Fame. We're trying to finish our yearbook and since most of them have day jobs, I do most of the editing. Shockingly enough, I learned a lot from the profiles and descriptions that my other batch mates gave to each other. Pretty cool way of knowing who he/she really is. I'm quite glad I volunteered as yearbook committee although, as secretary for the last school year we had, it was actually one of my obligations. Talk about me still active in this kind of stuff where I have long graduated from college. Its almost a year now. If I remember correctly we graduated on March 25, 2006!

And so I reminisce...



The weather is intolerable. Its getting quite hot that sometimes I'd like to imagine myself in a beach somewhere, holding a can of ice cold soda while dipping myself in a nice jacuzzi. Ahh daydreaming again...

We're planning on going to Bantayan to celebrate Ian and Karl's birthday as well as reunite with the rest of the ball manipulators. I miss hanging out with them. Cathy would hopefully be in Cebu by then. Louise is already having some preliminary plans but we have to think this through because for one, we don't know the place...

and so I reminisce some more...


This was taken when we were in Moalboal...such a nice beach...I'm currently listening to UPDHARMADOWN and let me just say, I love their music. Its cool, relaxing and yet thought provoking. Thanks to this site: mackymarc
I have the entire album...you should check it out and listen to their tunes...


And finally, my last project is to choreograph a dance...wish me luck!

Later dudes and dudettes...

Goodbye Lauren, Welcome back Vanessa

I'm here in one of the cafe's near our house trying to get a hold of the list of my contributions for SSS but unfortunately their website: www.sss.gov.ph is not accessible so it would mean I'll have to try again tomorrow.

I finally resigned from my job... I'm not a call center agent anymore, thank God! I've had enough of phones, answering phones, getting pushed around by people I don't know and I can't even see. They seem to be pretty impressed that I can speak straight english considering I'm not in the states and I'm not American...

Well I'm trying to finish all the requirements for Accenture. I guess my career path is really in Manila, not in Cebu. After my second interview in EPSON, I didn't hear from them again. I was kinda hoping I won't get in...It seems scary to be deployed for a huge project involving embedded systems design and not being prepared. My review for C and the rest of what I was trying to accomplish like Flash and Php are put on hold since my computer's dead again. This time its the processor. This happened right after my brother installed iTunes! I tried to troubleshoot it myself but then my computer really died! :( I was even mortified when they told me that its the processor and that I had to change both my motherboard and my processor because Pentium 4 is already faced out! Fortunately I found a store still selling Pentium 4 processors. There's still life for my pc after all...

I'm back to my old self and better than ever. I'm ready to face another challenge in my life. I just felt sad leaving behind friends in CallTek. I have my batchmates, even if we were sent to different accounts but when we get together, we still have fun! My old team with Kate as my TL, my new team with Shine as my TL, not to mention my supervisor who was also my mentor and confidante, my friends from GTC and the breakfast club. I would really miss those crazy horror talks we have every morning over breakfast. But I'm also thankful that I'll be back to my old sleeping hours, I'll be able to see more of my family, well before I go to Manila that is...

And finally I'll be able to blog again. It has been so busy at the office lately that even if we have unlimited internet access, I can't write/type anything due to calls flooding in. And the last days of my stay there, they gave me a buddy to monitor and teach.

Well updates would have to end here because I don't want to spend too much on internet here at a cafe considering we are going to have broadband at home(finally!) as soon as my computers back!

so then people, welcome Vanessa back cause you'll be hearing much from her from now on!

chow!

Horoscope for the day!

Dear Vanessa Linda,
Here is your horoscope
for Monday, February 5:

If you're genuinely interested in someone, go with it. After all, what's more charming than your fascination with them? Nothing, that's what. Any information you share now will further strengthen your bond.


Would it still strengthen our bond if I'll be leaving soon?

continuation to the guy thing!

Okay since I have pretty much defined mostly the physical aspect of my "ideal guy" let me try to point out some things I like in a guy on a peronality aspect.

• someone who has a good sense of humor.
• someone who I can easily talk to, that I'm comfortable with even if I would be trapped in an elevator with him for 24 hours, I would still feel safe.
• someone who can be trusted with my secrets
• someone who's responsible enough to think of his own future
• someone who's mysterious enough to be quite interesting.
• he should be interested in one of the following: music, movies and arts for us to click
• someone who will be proud of who he is but would be humble enough not to talk too much about it.
• someone who would give up what he's doing just to listen to my ranting.
• someone who would talk and I'd listen and would also listen if I talk.
  
• someone who is passionate in what he's doing
• someone who has compassion for the poor and oppressed
• someone who goes to Church at least on Sundays
• someone who has strong faith in God

so far those are the things that crossed my mind without focusing on a guy in my past whom I liked or the guy that I liked now. I know it would seem kinda biased if most of these descriptions pertain to the person I liked now. Maybe there is a pattern to all this likeness. A pattern I need to break for me to be able to "Find my one true love"...

please do not be fooled by the picture of Milo Ventimiglia on this post. I just liked his face and his character on Gilmore Girls but then he ended up being such a coward to really say what he feels to Rory up until the moment it was too late.

he has a pretty good role in Heroes though...better watch out for that.

to simply put it, I'm kinda into guys who are not so goody-goody...I have that image and that reputation...Our relationship would be such a bore if we're all too good...right?

and they say when it comes to boys I'm picky...

Okay, so I have finally admitted to myself that when it comes to guys I am picky... I mean come on, who isn't right? Don't tell me you don't have several things to consider before even thinking of saying yes to a date! I know that I'm supposed to go on massive dating to be able to know who my one true love is but does one really settle for someone who's there? Should one settle?

I know this is such a superficial criteria but what the heck...Here are the likes and dislikes, just in case someone who's interested blog hops and would consider dating moi!

• I definitely don't like it when a guy smokes. I mean I know smoking doesn't say everything that he is and he is not but due to my health problems, I'd stay away from those guys. I remember telling my best guy friend Doyle when we were still in college, sitting in the canteen: "Doyle, if I won't be able to meet a guy who doesn't smoke, I will never get married!" uh oh, seems like I'm on the track of not getting married Doyle!

• I'm so keen with teeth... I don't know, sometimes guys with good teeth also has clean nails and clean everything. I can't imagine talking to somebody with bad breathe, can you? I'm not saying he should have this straight-gone-through-braces kinda teeth but he shouldn't have bad breathe.

• He should have clean nails, not long nails. Being a rocker is not an excuse. I mean he could still be a rock star with short nails. Black painted nails are acceptable as long as its not long. And the nails on the feet should also be clean!

• He can have long hair as long as it doesn't cover his face. I even find this one guy nice looking and he has this long dreads on top of his head. That's because he still looks neat even if he had that kind of hair.

• I'm getting tired of having to be the one to take care of the other so I want for once in my life to be pampered. So here goes: he should at least open the door for me, be on the danger side of the road, let me go in the jeepney/taxi first, doesn't have to pull the chair for me but would definitely offer one if there are none left, would at least offer to pay for his half or for both if has the money and would at least have the decency to offer that he would take me home.

We're kinda receiving a lot of calls so I'll have to cut this short...comments people will surely be appreciated...thanks!

to be continued...

farewell tess...

My cousin left for New Zealand yesterday noon. I wasn't at the airport to send her off because I was too wasted and too sleepy to even open my eyes. Night shift job really sucks out all the energy from me.

WHO IS TESS?
Born August 12, 1984, she is named Marie Therese Labay Lambo by her parents Alastair Burgos Lambo and Concetta Salazar Labay Lambo. She is my 1st degree cousin from my father's side of the family. We basically grew up together. Went to the same school since we were nursery, were classmates from 6th grade to 3rd year high school. We were supposed to take the same course --Computer Engineering in TC but then she was convinced by my Uncle Joel to take up nursing and so she transferred to CDC.

And now she's probably trying to settle her stuff at the dormitory she'll be staying in for 5 weeks. She will still undergo training before finally working.

farewell tess...
i hope that i can still see
the goodness that you've always rendered to me
eventhough things are misunderstood
you'll have that soft spot in my heart...
I will surely miss
your smile, laughter and even the tears
i know you'll have a good life
just remember
I'll always be here...

the first edited pick that had a good feedback

new multiply account

I have a new multiply account:

Ad Astra

feel free to visit it...

what's instore:

pictures, music, events and more insanity!

a message from him????

You’re all smiles and silly conversation
As if this sunny day came just for you
You twist your hair, you smile, and you turn your eyes away
C’mon, tell me what’s right with you
Now it dawns on me probably everybody’s talkin’
And there’s something here I’m supposed to realize
‘Cause your secret’s out, and the universe laughs at its joke on me
I just caught it in your eyes, it’s a beautiful surprise

When did you fall in love with me?
Was it out of the blue
‘Cause I swear I never knew it
When did you let your heart run free?
Have you been waiting long?
When did you fall in love with me?
When did you fall in love?

Make your way over here, sit down by this fool, and let’s rewind
C’mon, let’s go back and replay all our scenes
You can point out the hints, the clues, the twists and the smiles this time
All the ones that slipped by me
I bet my face is red, and you can hear my heart poundin’
Well I guess it don’t matter now that I realize
‘Cause baby I missed it then, but I can surely see you now
Right here before my eyes
You’re my beautiful surprise

When did you fall in love with me?
Was it out of the blue
‘Cause I swear I never knew it
When did you let your heart run free?
Have you been waiting long?
When did you fall in love with me?
When did you fall in love?

Was it at the coffee shop
Or that morning at the bus stop
When you almost slipped, and I caught your hand
Or the time we built the snowman
The day at the beach, sandy and warm
Or the night with the scary thunderstorm
I never saw the signs
Now we’ve got to make up for lost time
And I can tell now by the way that you’re looking at me
I’d better finish this song so my lips will be free

Have you been waiting long, when did you fall in love
I kept you waiting so long, when did you fall
Have you been waiting long
When did you fall in love with me
When did you fall in love?

my horrorscope for today...

There's no telling what could grow out of a new relationship that gets its start today, so do not cast your hopes too far into the future. Taking each day as it comes is a real test of your patience, but it is the wiser way to go. Intimate friendships and true romances evolve over time. You will have to wait until the two of you are involved in more diverse situations before coming to any conclusions about who this person is or how he or she may affect your life.

MY WORST NIGHTMARE

I'm having a headache right now and I don't know why. Its still the start of my shift but then I want it to end now. I wanted to go to the hospital and be with my family. My brother was admitted because I found him lying on the restroom floor. I thought he slipped but then when I looked at him he was having a seizure. His fingers were clenched and his eyes rolled upwards and he was like gasping for air. I was in utmost panic, not knowing whether to shake him off or to keep him still till the seizure subsides. It was the most terrifying 60 seconds of my entire life. It was scarier than facing the panel members during our final run for defense, scarier than the ride home with someone drunk taking the wheel. When it ended I helped him up with all my strength and had him lay down on our coach. I called my mom right away because basically I didn't know what to do.

He seemed okay after and he didn't seem to remember what happened saying he just passed out. But the image of what happened keep playing in my mind and it always makes me want to cry. But then I have to be strong for my brother, my mother and my father. I can't show them that I'm scared to death and break down. I insisted on having him checked, get all the tests done just to make sure that he's okay, that he's healthy and that he still have 100 more years to live.

I love my brother eventhough he seems such a pain at times. But he's also fun to be with, he keeps me in pace. We're the same in most aspect, born leader, speaker; talented and artistic; but he exerted more effort in the things that we love. His passion is greater than mine so he had most of the awards. Without either one of my family I would be broken. I would live but then my soul and heart would die.

So ladies and gentleman, there you go. I have simply give away one of my greatest fears:
TO LOSE SOMEONE I LOVE!

My brother is okay now, he's still in the hospital waiting for Monday since he still needs a CAT scan and EEG. Although I really don't know what that is for but basically its to check the brain and its functionality.

I will from now on take care of my brother. Even if he's mean to me sometimes I would master up all my patience, compassion and love to take good care of him!

im not ready to cross that line yet...what does that mean?

Happy new year. Took me a while to update again either due to the lack of inspiration or just plainly can't think of anything to blog about.

After the new year, my life basically is the same. No drastic change there.

I have been drowning myself with reruns, mostly of the Dr.House series. Ahh...Dr. Gregory House is amazing. The entire diagnostics department is absolutely entertaining, which includes Dr. Eric Foreman - the irritating black guy who tries to be like House but could never live up to the standards because he can't stand up to his decisions and can't handle the consequences of his actions, Dr. Robert Chase - the cutie doctor who keeps on second guessing and who's also irritating me since he's such a tattletale, Dr. Allison Cameron - very pretty doctor who's madly inlove with House and although he's not officially part of the team but he still contributes mostly: Dr. James Wilson, the good-hearted oncologist who is House's sole confidant.

Aside from learning a lot of medical stuff which suprisingly doesn't bore me out, I also ran into a couple of realization and life lessons on the series.

But that is not the main reason why I decided to blog today...

Ever since I realized that I had my a rude awakening a couple of months after I hit the floor, it seems that reality keeps on hitting me hard more often than it should. I mean I've already told Cathy that I had a social awakening although I'm not really sure if I understand its meaning or if it applies to what I have discovered of other people's views on life and their reaction to the circumstances that have fallen upon their decision. What am I saying? Well as what I have told my office buddy JP, I realized that I was still too naive of things. That was the night after I drank with one of my batchmates and heard from her very mouth what despicable things she did. Its not that bad actually, its just me questioning the moral aspect of the actions. But lets not talk about her too much because its not my story to tell. But then heck it was still a huge shocker. And then I got over it. I was okay for a couple of weeks and then I questioned myself again. Its a battle basically between what is morally right and what is not. What does morality have to do with any of this rude awakening? Actually, its finding out that what I thought was morally incorrect is actually acceptable in this day and age. Then I go back to the blog furies I had before about me being judged as a moralist which for me was unacceptable. But then again setting the meaning of a moralist aside, should I consider myself a moralist? Is it such a bad thing?

And what does this soul searching got anything to do with the title of this blog?

Well I was supposed to have my first real date tonight but then he blew me off... And that was his reason: I'M NOT READY TO CROSS THAT LINE YET... I didn't for a second think or rather couldn't think. I mean I wasn't supposed to say yes to his invitation for coffee since I bailed out on my friends for dinner basically because I didn't want to rush after dinner going to work. And I wouldn't like the feeling of not getting enough time to talk and catch up. My apologies to Louise and Ian. Then he called and told me he wanted to have a little chat over coffee before my shift and well I did consider thinking it would be a good adventure and experience to go through. I admit I was a bit hesitant and excited at the same time. I know how pathetic of me.

Why hesitant? because he's not exactly the type of guy you want me to go out with. I mean I haven't actually fully defined my ideal guy but to be honest he's far from my ideal ideal guy...hehehe...

continuation....

So as I was saying this guy asked me to coffee and blew me off. I was expecting that but then I was even pissed at myself for believing this romance could happen to me NOW! I'm not saying that I'm getting pessimistic on that part but then again... So here I am, trying to get over the very thought of what happened. He did go to the office and he was like several feet away from me but then he could walk to my cubicle to talk to me and apologized but he didn't instead he IMed me and well he did say he was sorry.

I don't want to dwell more on this matter anymore. There I've written it and I'm so over!

I'm working in a CENTER!

As of the moment, I work in a center. Nope, not in a call center but just a center. Where we come here at around 8:30 pm just in time to turn on my computer, open my links, login to my IP phone and for almost 4 hours now, I'm still not receiving a single call. We are paid to surf the net, check our mails, check our friendster, myspace and multiply accounts. We are also paid to have a birthday bash and eat ice cream in the pantry. We are paid to listen to as many mp3s as we want and sometimes is paid to download depending on who you're talking about. What a job, right?

WHY AREN'T WE RECEIVING CALLS?

ANSWER: Earthquake in Taiwan

It was such an unfortunate event that happened because eventhough there were only 2 casualties but call center business here in the Philippines will be gravely affected by the tragedy. My only fear is that due to this we won't be coming in to work; which means we won't have salary. What a crappy thought...

Its almost the end of the year. Have I done enough this year? Am I the same person? or did I change like the tides?

I'll try to answer that in a couple of days...too early for answers, but not too early to be planning for the next year. I have got to start saving...That'll be the priority...The rest follows...

the world is too small for me...

I had nothing to do since finally America decided to celebrate their Christmas and stopped calling for tech support. So once again I browsed through the world wide web and to narrow it down, I browsed through the wide selection of Friendsters.

While I was reading through the testimonials of his relatives, I found out that I have seen his cousins near our place. I think we belong to the same barangay, go to the same Church and well actually bumped into each other several times before. I remember smiling at them thinking that they seem to look so damn familiar. Then I found out that my second degree cousin JP are classmates with his cousin. And weeks before I found out that the cute gay guy who smiled at me during "peace be with you" while I was attending mass with my mom is also his cousin. You see how interconnected I am to his world? How can I try to let go of the notion that we fit in the same world? I know you would tell me again not to think about it but the world is getting smaller and it becomes more complicated on my part.

There is something terribly wrong with the picture now. His sister would text me out of the blue. I'm pretty sure that she has lots of friends to communicate with but then she still remembers to send me a "hello" every now and then. I'm making this such a big deal. But she basically doesn't know anything about me. We just talked in person during his graduation. We do text but still not enough for her to consider me as a friend. Well, don't get me wrong because I am grateful for the bond that I have formed with his sister. Its just seems weird sometimes.

You know when I miss him so much?

--when I hear the songs he likes...
--when I look at the sky and see the stars and remember the saying that we are under the same sky looking at the same moon...
--when I see cool pictures at deviant wanting to share it with him knowing that he loves photography as much as I do...
--when I eat pizza especially if I'm alone thinking how he would have enjoyed the treat...

This is getting way tambien(as per my Canadian chatmate Elmo) -- (too) complicated and weird for me...Can I handle this without going crazy?

anyway...



I enjoyed eating the jelly beans my TL is sharing...Its really yummy and I'm going to add it to my list of favorite foods...yum!

Merry Christmas Darling

I spent my inevitable lonely Year 2006 Christmas at the CallTek office, taking a call and talking to some lady who had trouble connecting to the wireless internet. I thought I won't be getting a call but then boom, 2 minutes before 12 which was supposedly my meal break, my phone rang and the rest is history. The people around me were greeting each other, there are already fireworks outside and my groupies are having picture taking and I was taking a call... Well at that very moment, I felt like crying. It seems like I'm not part of the festivity. Its supposed to be a happy occassion but then I was there, and look at myself and felt sorry for me. I know sound so lame but Christmas for me is one of the most important family gathering. And for the first time, I wasn't there to distribute the gifts, I wasn't there to organize the games, I wasn't there to watch a movie with my cousins and talk till morning light comes. Times change, and time changed me. I know I will be able to cope with this and then I realized the moment passed by.

And I realized that if we dread something so much or we look forward to it, that moment will not be still, time will not freeze and we do move on.

Merry Christmas darling
tried to give you a ring
actually it was two
but I never got to you
Once again I gave my heart away
to a person who seems to have no interest
and I'm left hanging by a thread
holding my expectations abridge
when will I ever learn
when will I ever stop giving away
what is left of my heart on Christmas?

i miss those times...

I went out with my girlfriends Louise and Cathy yesterday... I realized I missed hanging out with them, talking about so many things. If we're together, we can't stop talking. Especially that Cathy, who's now working as a flight attendant for Qatar Airways has been traveling a lot so she(the most talkative of us 3) has a lot of stories to tell.

Our whole afternoon was spent eating and talking. At first Louise and I had lunch at Bigby's. I told her I'll just get a sandwich coz we're absolutely sure that when Cathy arrives, we'll be on our way to Starbucks. When we got our orders got 2 huge slices of twin cheese panini sandwich. O my gosh! And although I don't eat sandwiches in restaurants that much, but that was really yummy. I only ate one slice and then had the other one packed for take out. Cathy arrived shortly and thus begun her tale of both the good and the not so frightening experiences she had on her job. When she speaks she's really animated. hehehe ... I mean she uses her hands and you can really see her expression change as she tells the story. We continued our ramblings at Starbucks. Ian - Louise's boyfriend arrived shortly after we arrived and thus they started the teasing... Lousie's sister, Leah aslo hanged out with us. Here are some pictures...

from left: with Leah, Cathy and Louise @ Starbucks


from left: with Engr. Wilfrid Ian Tan, Cathy and Louise

Cathy's flying back to Doha on the 21st. Like me, she's not spending her Christmas with the family but working probably on plane to India. While I would be spending mine at the office, in my cube taking a call...*sigh*

Well I'll be missing Cathy till she comes home hopefully March of next year in time for Ian and Karl's birthday and our long planned and most awaited trip to Camiguin.

Then we had dinner at Chikaan, a Filipino restaurant near my office. These are the good times, talking and laughing with old friends. Alain(Cathy's boyfriend) and Karl joined us for dinner. I can't believe college years are over but I still get to keep my closest college friends. These people have become my family for the remaining years I struggle through college.

Here's a picture of the guys: from left, Alain, Karl and Ian.


And the girls: from left, me, Cathy and Louise.

Even if I didn't get enough sleep and was 15 minutes late for work at least I get to spend time with my friends and catch up on things. I miss them very much. I'm looking forward to our Christmas dinner and night out. Unfortunately Cathy won't be there. =( =)

Till next time...

My day gets weirder everyday...

I heard mass today and I liked the priest's homily. He was telling this story about a class having an exam in Math. He said most people disliked math. (well I've always liked math even if I almost failed in Differential Calculus!) The teacher told the students that they only have 30 minutes to answer the exam...Such a bummer, 30 minutes won't be enough. But then there was this one student who answered the exam in only 5 minutes. So the teacher asked him "how did you finish the exam in only 5 minutes?" The students said "I turned my head to the right and I saw a man. And so I solved the man and I was able to solve the world!"


At first I thought that the man the student was referring to is Jesus but then when the priest explained, the man is supposed to be ME. He said that we should try to solve ourselves first before trying to conquer the rest of the world. Point taken... But then he also said that in trying to figure out who we are, we lose ourselves in the process. And that's such a sad thought. But that's the reason why we need to PRAY. To be guided and enlightened in the journey of searching for who we really are. It is only by faith that we survive the perils of finding our true identity.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
he1 told me:
i never knew, i never knew that everything was falling thru...

so I asked:
what is it exactly that he2 told you about me?

he1 told me:
secret...i won't tell on him...

so I let the topic go...

when I got home, ready to sleep, he2 called...

he2 said:
let's have breakfast at tiffany's...

then I said:
thanks for the invite. but i already ate mine...sorry...

he2 said:
no biggie...

but he2 didn't say there was always a next time...that was it...

Then I ask myself: Is it always this complicated? Like do we always have to play cat and mouse in pursuing a person?

You would ask: Do you like him?

I would probably answer: I don't know, not yet...I could like him...

So I say there is always room for a possibility but the possibility flew even before it begun...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Let Loose...

We had our company party last night and unfortunately for me, days before, I learned from my brother that our digi cam is not working. I didn't get the chance to had it fixed since I'm caught up with work and doing a panic shopping for our costume and my gift for our chris cringle for the company and manito manita for out batch. So I missed the night's fun of taking pictures and letting lose of the aspiring photographer in me... But then again here are some photos taken by my officemate JP!

These are some of the GS(GlobalSuite) Señoritas. We won 2nd place for the CallTek signature dance contest. For me, it was one of the greatest performance I did. Or maybe I just missed dancing that much that's why after the dance, I felt wonderful!

See how chubby I am?hehehe...Can't help it, I love to eat. Anyways, I tried to improvise a cowgirl look. I just bought the belt for P150 and the boots(not visible in this picture) for also P150. Didn't want to spend more than P500 bucks on shoes I won't be using anymore. I love the hat though, courtesy of my cousin Toby. He loved dressing up like a cowboy.

This is take during the disco part. I dance till I dropped. My feet are killing me. Doesn't look like I'm hurting right? If there's a camera, I'd really smile! With Sue, one of the GS night shift chicks.

You see? There are a lot of pretty girls in CallTek. From left: Cheska aka Tadz, Lerah, Me, Sue aka Toto, Drew aka Kai and Aries. The one at the back of Drew is Cheryl, one of my batch mates in CallTek.

Looks like a rave party right? Well no wonder, CallTek's motto: Work hard, party harder.

Still another photograph with Cheska, Drew, Gabby and Sue.

All in all, I had fun! Especially when I danced with my batchmates. Too bad we weren't able to get our batch's picture taken. (reminds me of my cam again!Arrgggg!) We also won 1st prize for the Christmas tree making contest. Thank God our hardwork paid off...

This is our Award winning Christmas Tree.

I realized, I'm still not comfortable with grindin' with a guy... Or could be it depends on who I'm grindin' with. Too embarrassing for me...*blush*

THE AFTER PARTY PARTY?

After the party we decided to continue our dancing @ Vudu. But unfortunately the place is too crowded with preppies that we decided to chill at the resto bar beside Vudu. We tried their food and ordered some cocktails. We got the promo to order 3 cocktails for P200. So we ordered 2 Cosmopolitan and a Mandrin Mandrino. Their Spanish ham was delicious and the rest are A'ok! We went back to Nancy aka Canence's boarding house around 2:45 am. We slept around 3! We were so tired. And my feet are really exhausted.

In the end, its just another company Christmas party...and we move on!