WOULD YOU?
All day I have been tackling with people who seem to be diving down that steep slope of depression. I talk them out of their insecurities leaving me all worn out and depressed myself. I knocked my brains out thinking of all the kind and encouraging words I could say...And yet here I am...feeling awfully downtrodden...Feeling emo of all the days...Why?
I wish people could just get of my case of being single. It's not happening to me. And there's nothing wrong with me or them or both for that matter it isn't just happening. It's not that fate is angry with me because it's not letting me be happy. I am happy most of the time. I am happy when in a day I am not questioned if I am married or why I am not yet married...Hello? At 25 with a salary of less than 30 grand? I don't think I could afford to have a husband just yet, if you know what I mean! Then the next irritating question pops up, why don't you have a boyfriend? Maybe you're too picky! It's not like I could tap any guy in the shoulder and tell them "Hey dude! I am single and available. I am a software engineer who knows how to cook, clean and do the laundry. I also am a fabulous dancer and an aspiring artist. I am mentally stable with an IQ of more than 120! Wont you be my boyfriend? Please?" How could I be picky? I don't have a problem with anybody. I could get along with any type of crowd. I might have a problem with smoking before but heck that's just a minor detail. Truth is, even I don't know the reason why...I've had it with all this relationship sh*t...Life should be more than that, should be more than romance. It is just part of one's life and other people should understand that not all people are blessed with that kind of grace, to have someone to have and hold. Missing that aspect in life should not make a person less whole.
On a day such as this it would all boil down to me being contented and grateful with what I have right now, loving dysfunctional united family and friends who wouldn't mind my tagging along and that certain someone who doesn't even have a clue that he completes my day. I am a simple soul with simple wishes. Small things could make me happy. This should not bring my spirit down...
This is just one of those days I wish wouldn't happen again! I'll probably just sleep over it.
Bonsoir!
2 comments:
"I find loving myself to be an uncomfortable act. I have been told so many times and in so many ways that I am not worth loving that, at some point, I started to believe the idea. It is much easier for me to love a thought, a concept, or another person above myself. Committing love to myself means there is little to negotiate; it is as simple as giving to myself that which I need the most. I don’t always see the returns of self-love in an obvious way, as I might if I were to give my love to you." ~ Billy Corgan
Post a Comment