Good Friday

It's Good Friday but here I am still facing the computer after I've figured out why my front USB ports are not working anymore. I kinda promised myself I'd clean my CPU, optimize my hard disk, free up some space -- if its possible, arrange my folders and so on and so forth...And I have to upload pictures both in APC (Accenture Photography Club) sharepoint and also in my multiply site. We're supposed be abstaining from the things we normally do which includes browsing through the net and anything that has to do with computers. But I have no other time. I can barely open my eyes when I get home from work so I'd grab this chance at a holiday and get another part of my cyber world going.

March -- another pretty exciting month. Got tons to look forward to. One is the Diversity seminar which will be on March 29th and the Accenture Cebu Beach Volleyball Tournament on March 30. Plus there's my ongoing Hip-hop class which by the way is like icing on my cake. Heck I get to dance again and practice my craft. Yepee...I'm so happy...

I'm supposed to change templates every month. Hmmm... I hope I can still do that considering all the work and non-work activities in the office.

I can already feel the heat of summer...Another season to look forward to besides my turning 24!Argggg....Can't believe it...I thought I'd like to get married at that age but now that its fast approaching, I think I'll postpone it and would take my financial stability as basis for my readiness to get married. Of course having an actual spouse is another thing...I'm kinda working on it...nahh joke! hehehe...I'm just taking it one step at a time and if life throws me the chance to be with that one man I love, I'd probably cross that bridge when I get there!

I'm still learning photography, music, time management, people management and a whole lot of personality improvement techniques...I hope I can grasp all these knowledge and use it to my advantage.

Toodles...

rubber band

Rubber band is a short length of rubber and latex formed into a loop. Its of course elastic and durable. But it also has its limit to the point that if you stretch it too much, it will break off...

Work has been great in the sense that I have been kept busy, pretty much engaged but still able to attain the much valued "work life balance". This is one of the reasons why I haven't been blogging lately. And the rest, well... let's just say I'm living life!

Two major events this February that happened in the past weeks have been:

Valentines Day
One of the most dreaded day. But if finally came with the hope that it wouldn't be the same as last year or the year before! Surprisingly, the night before I received some flowers from Joel, my cube mate. They were callalily flowers. The kind of flowers I liked. He gave them to 7 girls in the office including myself. He has been such a great cubie and I really appreciate all his help and time when I needed someone to chat with. I told him, he's future girlfriend (since he's still single) would probably be very pampered and lucky to have him as a boyfriend. Hope guys could be as thoughtful as him. I also received chocolates from Mommy Wheng (she's my confidante in terms of work and the pet peeves) and lastly Cadbury chocolate from hmmm...SECRET! Happy thought!
I finally realized how great the feeling is if you won't expect and it all just comes as a surprise. At the end of the busy and tiring day, I went home to my family happy and contented. I just wish we could've had more time to hang out that day. Of course it would just be dinner. But then again, any time spent with him is important to me.


BORACAY!!!
The following day we were off to Boracay. Took a flight from Cebu to Kalibo, Aklan! Rode the coaster from Kalibo to Caticlan and finally a pump boat ride from Caticlan to Boracay. Another never-have-thought-I-could-be-here moment. A dream come true. The sand was so fine and the company I was with - maia, ipay, rhea, edu, jon, bing, andy, canence, sly and che - were great bunch! All the time I was there, I couldn't help but think how I wish someday I could bring my family here to enjoy the beach. It was an island with a long stretch beach and lotsa people in beach shorts and bikinis. More on this on the next blog!

The week after I'm back to being a rubber band. There were times I was to break but then I bounced back to being a loop. I am elastic and durable! I should get through whatever turmoil and stretching there could ever be...

Pet Peeves

I'm not the type of person who holds grudges. If you cross me just give it at most a day for me to recover and the following day, everything's back to normal. But this time, this pet peeves' voice keep ringing in my ear. Her high pitched complaints, her swearing and even her evil laugh haunts my dreams. I'm supposed to just shut it and go on with my work and the rest of my life but she's every where. She's just actually across me...How can I avoid commenting when every time she speaks she makes a fool of her self trying to make a fool out of everybody. Yes what we've got here is a miss-no-it-all b*tch! I should slap myself for trusting her with things about me not expecting that she might use it someday to embarrass me in front of everybody. But I let that point pass because its not too destructive of my reputation. But then comes arguments with regards to work. Trying to set professionalism into play, I calmly explained my side trying my best to sound patient and calm but then her selfishness paved way to her stupidity and waived her capacity to comprehend the process of what we are doing. Steam was coming out of my ears and my face was red and I felt like I was having a fever all of a sudden. Instead of arguing more which by the way I so dislike, I walked away. I went first to Louise's cube to vent out silently, cried a bit to let the steam off and then went to Rhea's cube to laugh it off. Somebody saw me crying and asked. I was tempted to give a bit of what happened and it turned out the entire people in the office well except for her so-called ally disliked her attitude. Then I realized I pity her, she might have friends but someday, they may also leave her because of her bad attitude and foul words.
We'll be having our training for Advanced Smartforms and Advanced IDOCs next week so I won't probably be able to chat and answer emails right away. I'll probably stay as far away from her as possible. There goes my pet peeves for the week... I hope it'll be better next week.

s i n u l o g

I'm pretty excited for Sunday's event. Not only will I be back in celebrating Sinulog - for the past 2 years I've spent it either working on a project or working as an agent - I am more or less participating in it. We'll be covering the event. I'm lucky I got in the Accenture Photography Club and well we have extra perks like getting a Sinulog Photographer's ID for free. Well the company shouldered the expenses so all we have to do is take extraordinary pictures. Whew, such a challenge since I'm still a beginner. Before, I thought its all about perspective and that right timing in capturing the moment. But then after attending the Photography 101 class with Ed Canuto, I realized getting proper lighting makes a huge difference. Then comes aperture, ISO and shutter speed. And that even if you don't have that DSLR (Digital Single Lens Reflex) camera, its merely a point-and-shoot type, just make sure that you have manual settings on it so that you can adjust the 3 important settings. Its going to be tough considering there'll be a lot of people in the streets. But the crowd, the heat and the long winding road won't stop me in enjoying this moment.

PIT SEÑOR!

Just another typical day?

You might wonder why of all the things that happened to me why I should blog about this. Well for one this is a first for this year. 2008. Year of the RAT. It's our year. It's MY year! And as I watched the fireworks on New year's eve, I can't help but feel this huge sense of hope. It feels good to be hopeful, to be looking forward to the vast unknown. Not only am I hopeful but I'm also optimistic that something wonderful will happen this year.

Okay so back to the topic, I got asked out. I know at almost 24 this is such a lame story to feel tingles about. But just give me this chance to let it out.

The guy:
He was my classmate in 4th grade. He said we were friends but unfortunately I didn't remember. I got curious about him because he remembered more stuff about me in 4th grade than I do. It's weird, he even remembered me giving myself a code name of ICEBOX! Anyway he works in EPSON now as a software engineer.

The move:
We texted. Actually he keeps forwarding text messages and sometimes I'd say hello. On a Thursday morning I did after receiving a forwarded message. Then he said he has a delayed Christmas gift for me. I was shocked, didn't expect a gift this late and not one from him. And so he said he wants to give it to me Friday. So that would mean we'd meet up somewhere. He suggested IT park but I declined and suggested Ayala, much nearer to the office. And so there it was, my first official date for the year.

The fear:
We're not that close. I don't usually go out with guys whom I'm not familiar with. I don't usually go out with guys alone. But he's supposed to be my batch mate in elementary, what's there to fear? I am a people person who can converse to different types of people of different age. So why was I so apprehensive about it?

The aftermath:
We met up at national bookstore because I had the urge to buy a book and ended up buying 2: The Living Word, a daily devotional and Pride and Prejudice. We ate dinner at KFC. We pretty much talked about work and the past. He's good company. And surprisingly I relaxed and chatted my heart out. We walked back to our building because I had to turn off my PC before we rode a taxi home. He invited me for a night out but I once again declined. Dropped him off at Mango. I know I should get a life but I'm sick and its such a huge hassle to go out late. When I arrived home we texted some more and ended up asking each other questions. It was good friendly date.

Lessons learned:

I shouldn't doubt my ability to carry myself before anybody
especially when I go out on dates.
That people go out on dates because they want to see the other
person and learn more about them.
That its good to expand my horizon and know more people
outside my circle and outside my office.

P A S K O

As part of the Christmas tradition/obligation, we attended mass yesterday at Sto. Rosario church. I applaud the priest for giving out a great humorous and straight to the point sermon. Of all the masses I have attended, never have I learned so much and laughed so much at the same time. The priest -unfortunately forgot his name- talked about the true meaning of PASKO, a word which means Christmas in our native tongue. Here's a quick summary of his sermon.

P - Pasudla si Cristo - Let Christ enter. For me it means letting Christ's love spread to ever inch of you that you will be able to muster up the courage to forgive, let go of old grudges, forget debts or perhaps delay payment, erase all the hurt and pain you felt towards another person or because of another person. It's easier said than done, I know, but we can at least try if we do believe that Christ is the ultimate savior and He died for us for one reason and one reason alone: LOVE!

A - Atras Bisyo - Step back on the vices. What are these vices we need to eliminate?

B - Babae -- for guys, stop adultery, could be for girls as well...
I - Inom -- alcoholism
S - Sugal -- gambling
YO - Yosi -- smoking

-- while listening to the priest I can't help but look to my left and witness my father's reaction. He has two of the aforementioned vices and I'm not quite sure if he's taking the priest's sermon seriously or he's just letting it pass his other ear. The priest said that its hard to stop right away, to those who drink that they might do it in moderation because too much of everything is dangerous and bad. I do agree 100%. And he went on about smoking and lung cancer. I just wish my father would be touched by his words, its not mine anymore but the priests and somehow, priests are extension of God's voice. I hope he listens this time.

S - Simba - Go to Church. Don't just go to church and sleep, or talk/backbite, or text every now and then. Go to church and listen to what God has to say about your prayers. Most Catholics who go to church have something to ask from God and most of the time they expect answers. But somehow it doesn't work that way. You have to listen very carefully within your heart because sometimes its only through yourself that God gives his answers.

K - Katag ang maayong buhat - Spread your good deeds. Very self explanatory but very hard to do. Just be a good example. Do what you think may not just be for your own good but also for the good of others around you.

O - Ora mismo - Right now! - Do all of these right now. Don't wait for tomorrow to start changing/doing what you have to do. Tomorrow may not come at all.
Hey I'm no saint, I might be struck by one of the latter points but I have so much love in me I'm willing to give it a try and you should too...

Maayong Pasko kaninyong tanan!

Merry Christmas to all...

I had my fair share of holiday rush yesterday. I was with my brother and all along I thought it would be easy since I already have items in mind. But then what would you do if those items are not available anymore? Panic stricken, we roamed the streets of Colon till we ended up in Ayala. My budget was off the roof! But then my brother said, its okay. Christmas comes just once a year. And besides it would take me forever to find gifts that they might like but I don't like giving. Am I making sense here? Anyway, alls wrapped and ready to go...Whew!

After two weeks on not doing yoga, I had muscle aches on my shoulders again. Our final stint last Saturday was to do this Buddha pose, the one where you put your hands together as if praying but instead of putting it in the front, you do it at your back and then bend and put your head on your knee. I don't know if you can imagine it but the one secret to performing every yoga position is breathing. Didn't think I will be able to do it but with the help of our teacher, Arwina - nice name! I was able to pull it off.

I'll be on vacation leave till January 2, so I think I can blog more.

By the way, this is the pic I submitted for my profile. They weren't able to guess who I portrayed, if they paid attention to the middle name, they'd know it was me: NATASHA LOREIN AMOS HAWLEY...Tori Amos' daughter...Got the pic in Deviant though

updates:
-busy-needs rest-contented-kilig-fulfilled-happy-

Merry Christmas to all...

Paris Death and YOU

Pour aller à Paris et mourir!
To go to Paris and die!

PARIS -->

Should that be my dictum in life? Nah... Its just an expression our teacher in French introduced to us when we were talking about the unique jobs they have in France. Most if not all of the artists who created the most extraordinary paintings and sculptors were either from Italy or Spain or Portugal but they lived and died in Paris. Now, the very reason why I opted to jump right in and attend the first language class Accenture offers here in Cebu is that I might one day visit Paris (pronounced as Paree without an S). I know its one of those far-fetched dream of mine but heck who knows. Who could've known that I'd be able to visit Singapore while I was still in college? I love French - J'aime le francais. But I won't die in France...Which brings me to my second topic...

Should I write about you? Or the things about you that up to now surprises me? Is it safe to say that I'm trying to find out who you really are and so far, in spite of all the weirdness you show, I'm still enjoying every moment I spend with you...No this is me not falling...

DEATH -->
We were on our way to Ayala to buy something to eat when out of the blue he asked me: Are you afraid to die VAN? For a split second I thought and then said: NO! I bet that surprised him more than it surprised me because he fell silent for a minute and then asked: Are you sure? And then I told him: I'm actually not afraid to die but I'm more afraid if one of my loved-ones die. I can't bear the pain and loss. Then he said: You are still afraid of death!

Yes I'm afraid of death but not my own.
Yes I'm afraid of death but I have long accepted that it would someday come to each one of us.
Yes I'm afraid of death but its one of the inevitable.
Yes I'm afraid of death but that fear is overcome by faith in Christ.
Yes I'm afraid of death but that fear didn't stop me from living.

It was one of the weirdest conversations we had. And believe it or not I enjoyed it. With him I can think and blurt out whatever I'm thinking. I don't know how he does it but I can say whatever I want and he makes me think of wonderful ideas and takes away any hesitation of not sharing my thoughts.

Then I remembered all those morbid thoughts of my death: Me walking up the steep stairs and then there's a slippery part I missed to evade, I slipped and hit my head on the stair case breaking my skull killing me instantly; or me crossing the street then out of the blue a full speed 10 wheeler truck is just a couple of meters away from me hit me straight on smashing my body out of recognition; or me lying in a hospital bed with a bandage wrapped around my head, all my hair's gone and a life support holds my life together and then my family decides to pull the plug on me. I know, very cruel, very morbid and to me, very real. Could be one of the reasons why I'm not afraid to die, I have already imagined my death. I hope you don't my sharing of the gruesome side of Vanessa...

On another note:
And lastly if ever you get the chance to eat out somewhere, eat at City Grill, great food and a nice band --> 12 pm.

mind, body, heart and soul

What have I been doing the past days??? Didn't get the chance to blog since first and foremost nothing knocked on my brain till now. What am I to blog about???
Got a couple of news and updates:

I just finished my second session of YOGA yesterday and it was pretty challenging. Although the techniques were well demonstrated by our teachers/instructors my body unfortunately had a hard time mimicking the moves. Had to put much effort on rolling my body upwards after the push up position. I wasn't the least bit embarrassed since if not all then most of us including the guys couldn't lift their body's and do more than 2 rolling stints. This is quite a challenge for me since I just realized I'm not that flexible as I used to be when I was dancing with the Engineering Pop Jazz Team, but that was like 2 years ago. And up to now, I'm still into dancing and believe me I want so badly to dance again. But I have to get rid of this extra weight first and condition my body. With yoga - I'll be trying to do it everyday, badminton - every Sunday and proper diet - less rice more veggies and chocolates only on weekends I'm pretty positive that I'll have great results in due time. Which brings me to my second news...

My cousin came back from Singapore where she works as a nurse in one of the hospitals near Orchard - I forgot to ask her where exactly - assigned in the ICU department. She'll be here for the next two weeks and I couldn't be any more happier to see her. She gave me the huge news yesterday. She's getting married come August 2008 and guess who's going to be her maid-of-honor: ME! I couldn't believe it! Its the first wedding I've attended since my aunt got married 10 years ago. And me being maid-of-honor was surprising and well heart-warming. And she asked me to give her a hand in planning for it since she'll still be in Singapore till well August. I'm excited for the big day but I'm even more excited since I'll be participating in the planning. She bought tons of magazines just for us to browse through...Whew!
Well the third one on the list is not exactly news since this would probably sound more of a cliche since I've been going on and on about this since the birth of this blog. But I would still go on about it most especially after watching a movie that would make me think!

The captain told me: your one true love is just right before your eyes.
- rephrased from STARDUST

Then I though to myself if my prince charming is just right around the corner then he could be just someone among my dozen guy-friends. He could be that guy across me who has shares the same views on missionary work, takes the same classes as I do, sings and dances for God and has great faith in Him and by far the only one who calls me by my real nick name? Or that guy whom I thought I fell in love with, who plays awesome music with his hands and sings like there's no tomorrow - the ultimate artist? Or that guy whom I experienced most of my romantic days or so I thought, who's the complete opposite of me and who used to make me feel special.? Or is someone outside my circle, someone I'm yet to meet, not from Cebu or Manila, someone who's not from the solutions workforce, someone who doesn't belong to the industry? And you know what, not having to meet him yet makes it even more interesting, makes it more exciting. And if he does exist among my previous and current group of friends, I'm pretty sure that something wonderful will happen in God's chosen time. I do trust Him you know, and I've already given Him my heart for safe keeping. Its up to Him now to give it to somebody deserving, somebody who needs love and would most likely to reciprocate the love given!

What does a star do? Shine!
But for it to shine, it must mend
its broken heart!

mind, body, heart and sould

Chinese Proverbs...

The tortoise said that it always travels with its musical instrument in case it meets other musicians.

Stressing a state of maintaining a state of preparedness.

Tell a child to wash his body, he washes his stomach.

This is a sign of immaturity.

If the yam used in sacrifice does not die prematurely, it will eventually germinate.

Things will eventually improve despite the present difficulties.

Knock a valiant man on the ground and the shouts will be tremendous.

The downfall of a famous man attracts public attention.

Kill a warrior during skirmishes at home, you will remember him when fighting enemies.

Don't destroy your leaders.

Teasers Galore!!!

Here are some photos I edited for our fund raising...

The first one is for the first week. The one below is for the week that followed. The one that Doyle commented on is the 2nd one.


Unfortunately both didn't make the cut since they didn't comply with Accenture's standards. But I had fun doing them and learned some tricks a long the way. Appreciated LAYERS more now that I understand how we could manipulate the tools in Photoshop. By the way I used CS 2 for this. But you have to make sure that your memory is more than 512MB to be able to work around CS 2 without having to wait for your mouse pointer to move!

we give in sometimes

I had this office mate. She's pretty but stern looking. Every time I look at her and try to smile, I have second thoughts because there's no hint of smile on her face. She's not that friendly, well not as I hoped she would be. She's the only one in her batch I haven't said hi to. But then, her birthday came. Days before that I added most of their batch mates's YM's to my list. And so on her birthday I sent her a message crossing my fingers that she'd reply... And she did!On the way to Mylet's cube to get my lunch I dropped by her cube and said my greetings. Since then, I can officially say she's one of my acquaintance. I thought I would never get the chance to talk to her. I thought I would probably have this feeling of loathing when she's around. But its gone now...We do give in sometimes....

I finally decide to get out of the way. Its hard coz he's always around and people talk. One thing I've learned so far is not to be too trusting. Doyle and I admitted to ourselves that we have lots of acquaintances but not too many true friends. We can never tell who'll stick around to pick up the pieces when you're all down and broken. Weeks before I was stuck with the matter of friendship versus my pride. Friendship versus my feelings. Friendship versus self worth. Heck, he should have treated me differently. I am supposed to be different. I am supposed to be conservative. But I gave in to the idea of me breaking free of my old self. I listened to my cousin's voice: let loose, you're too frigid. And look what it got me. Funny how we often do stupid things before we learn. I gave in, got hurt and bounced back. I need to bounce back, I only have once choice...MOVE FORWARD!

As always, in an environment which is so conducive to change I try to blend in. I coexist. That's they only way to survive the wild jungle. But unlike the call center I worked before, people don't move out that often. And they come in most of the time. We're growing in number and we move a lot depending on the project. And now that I'm moving out of my current project yet to be welcomed in another, I'm filled with excitement. I'm kinda looking forward to it. You should have seen me a month ago. Too hesitant to be transferred, very scared of change. But now, I'm glad they've given me the break. Its up to me now to prove my worth. Wish me luck!





word's from the wise:

Sometimes, you just have to try not to care no matter how much you do.
Because sometimes you mean nothing to someone who means so much to you.
Its not pride, its called self-respect.

Busy week, such a busy week

I couldn't complain anymore. Got lots of task this week that I thought my life was a whirlwind. We had to design a postcard for a fund raising event. I never thought I could actually put my artistic side to good use. I had to pull out my flash tutorial from one of my hidden folders and tried to review it but then we ended up doing just a simple design in JPEG. We can't think of ways to embed flash to our emails since we need to email it to the entire Accenture population in the Philippines. Anyways, on top of that I was already given work from my boss in Manila. We had to do teleconferencing everyday just to discuss the task. My "tagalog" was polished to the brim. I'm unfortunately not too fluent with our national language. It's not that I hate it, its just that I get my tongue twisted most of the time. I also had to organize a give away present to two colleagues from our team who were going back to Manila. Whew. Emails left and right. YM's and AIM's here and there. Lots of questions which need answers. All I could think of was to shout: S T O P!!! Please...let me breathe for a second...My team mates from Creative club, my batch mates who have love problems, my TL!!! But then again, who am I to complain? I kinda wanted this, busy life! I wanted to be preoccupied all the time. So that I won't think of words such as LONELY, SAD, DISAPPOINTED, GONE, LOST and HEARTBROKEN. When Friday finally came, I ended up sleeping the day off. So much for that...

LESSONS LEARNED:

If you want to speak make sure that what you're going to say is true, necessary and kind.

Avoid talking about your love life and most importantly, don't ever preach about your sex life to just anybody!

You can only give as much as what you have.

Hanazakari no Kimitachi e...

You might be wondering why I haven't been blogging lately. For one, been busy with work; with the non-deliverables that is. Recently joined one of the demo meetings of Silver and White Toastmaster's Club. I still don't have that much load at work so I decided to join. Maia told me to do things on my own, which meant me being involved with activities without having my close friends tag along. She told me to do things which would eventually let me meet other people outside my circle. And its great, being out of my comfort zone. It was such a wonderful experience for me so I decided to join which meant more meetings...

Secondly, been having some badminton sessions every Tuesdays and Thursdays with my officemates. I'm still a neophyte at the game but at least I get to have a dose of exercise twice a week.

Thirdly, every time I get home I feel so tired and sleepy that I don't want to turn on the computer anymore. I just get to check things at the office but my eyes retire right away as soon as I step out. Been to an eye doctor lately. There's actually a difference between an Ophthalmologist and Optometrists. Ophthalmologists are trained and licensed to perform surgery and prescribe ocular, oral and systemic medicines. While the Optometrists on the other hand are not doctors but only received 4-5 years education on vision science, eye health and optometry-related areas.

Having this unveiling serious issue with my eyes, I decided to visit Dr. Yong Larrazabal's clinic in Cebu Doctor's University Hospital. I even met up with Dr. Yong face to face. He told me my eyes currently have allergies. I think it was because of what happened last Sunday. I was wearing my contact lenses with make-up on. Put on some mascara. And because I kept on laughing with tears in my eyes, some of the mascara dripped towards my eyes. I had to take off my contact lenses because it stung like hell. The optometrist who took preliminary examinations of my eye told me that while working, which entails me facing the computer more than 8 hours a day, its not advisable for me to be wearing my contact lenses since unfortunately I have dry eyes. She advised me to put on some eye drops to relieve the dry eyes. Dr. Yong prescribed me some eye drops and some eye vitamins. I'm off the contact lenses for now and I also had to have the lenses of my glasses changed. It turned out I have 300 myopic 75 astigmatism on my right eye and 300 myopic 25 astigmatism on my left eye. Its kinda alarming that my grade kept on increasing. Dr. Yong also suggested the Lasik surgery but then I still can't afford it for now that would have to be put off till later.

I recently finished the last episode of Hana Kimi Japan. Its a Japanese series which is full of funny scenes and heart-warming conversations. Even if you're not fond of Japanese series, might as well watch this because it has some moving learnings along with its intelligent humor.

I'm looking forward to my French class and my Yoga class...

So, Hanazakari no Kimitachi e. By the time we'll meet again, I'll still be here for you in full bloom! =)

How's Me?

Today my heart got crumpled again. Didn't choose to, didn't want to but due to those unexpected comments from friends - I know He means well - those happy pictures and a mis sent message makes the feeling come back and replicate into a thousand needles. Watched an episode of Grey's Anatomy and once again, Merideth's last line kinda stuck to my mind:

in the matter of knowing what you want,
those who doesn't know what they want
suffers the most.

I'm pretty positive I know what I want right now but why do I still suffer? I want to let go and move on. I am happy where I am now, I just wish I wouldn't get affected that easily. Well I would choose not to. Its all a matter of choice right?

So how's ME, you ask? Today, I'm hanging by a moment!

Take a quick peek...

Ok check out the slideshow I made for my friendster account. While watching the slide show, my mom took a peek. Then she said: "See van, your life is not boring! You have lots of things going on basing from those pictures!" Heck, yeah my life ain't boring. Its actually full of adventures. Here's the slide show! Enjoy!

Quote for the day!

Don't achieve to be greater than your contemporaries. Achieve to be greater than yourself!
- Criminal Minds

The Reason

I'm currently 23 years 4 months and 26 days old! I've already gotten my degree: BS Computer Engineering Major in Digital Systems Design and although my major is in hardware I have a job as an Associate Software Engineer in one of the leading consulting and outsourcing companies in the world. And I owe all of this to a whole lot of people. If it weren't for them, their sacrifices, their guidance, their time and effort, I would have been just another bum holding the remote control and I'd probably be fatter than I am now! (get the picture?)... So then it hit me, the very reason why I strive to reach my goals is basically for my family. They are center of every goal, every objective, every success...

When I was a child I wanted to be the president of the Philippines and I ended up being president of our first grade class. Tough job for a seven year old but I kinda got the hang of things so I ended up being public servant for the rest of the years I was in school. They say, most of those who enter politics joined because of the power. I say they're wrong. When I was an officer in class, it wasn't power that was given to me but a huge responsibility. And the way I see it, I was active in school because I love to serve. I love to organize events to bring people together, be involve in planning activities that would improve and develop people. I love working in the background and contributing whatever talent, skills and ideas I have in putting things in order and making events a big success. I had my fair share of ups and downs but never was I discouraged by rumors, critics and insults. I thought, heck they're just ingrates who weren't so damn blessed with the opportunity to serve.

And now I think I need to serve not just the community but most importantly the family who raised me to become the person I am now. They were the reason then and they're still my reason now. Its because of them that I am aiming to achieve a high position in Accenture. And serving my family would mean giving something back to the world. I owe them more than what I can probably give but then again as long as they're happy and at peace with the world, I am more than ecstatic.

new look, new life?

Got myself a haircut. My hair was too long for a wash and wear manage! Anyways here's my new look. This picture is taken at Kul's Kitchen when I had dinner with my friends from elementary.


It was taken using Karen's phone. So who were there and what do they do after 10 years (didn't realize it had been 10 years since I graduated from my elementary education in USC South Grade School).

In order of arrival:

Me - software engineer, Accenture
Mark Jusef Julio aka July - developer from Alliance loaned to Epson temporarily
April Victoria Pino aka Toriang- Med Rep
Karen Melody Migriño aka Karen - unemployed, reviewing for Accountancy Board Exam
Gizelle Faye Sembrano aka Ipay - Team Lead, Vonage Etelecare
Christy Surigao aka Christy - Nurse, Chong Hua Hospital
Emmanuel Delfino aka Eman - software engineer, Accenture
Manuel Baricuatro aka Junkoy - developer, Epson
Ma. Karla Bautista aka Kai - model, (don't know which agency)

We had coffee first at Mocha Blends then had dinner at Kul's. I couldn't get enough food! The day before I had dinner with Maia, Ipay, Edu and Rhea (college friends). Had my first taste of Persian Palate. It was really yummy!

Anyway, with regards to my title it doesn't actually come along that even if I had my hair cut short I should change who I am to people. I am still me, no matter how I look! Even if I miraculously lose 10 lbs. in 3 months time and probably look sexier (I wish!) I'd still love to help people, still want to keep my privacy, still want to hang out with friends and talk about Music, arts, movies and old classmates from elementary.

By the way, thanks for all those who read my blog and those who took time to post their thoughts on my chatterbox. A reader who doesn't want her/his/its identity to be known sent me an email.

Here goes:

Hey van,
Lets ask you then… Do you think close friends are still close friends when you’re intimate and hold hands? If you say yes, then yes it can be but honestly deep inside ur wishing it could be more than that…. Its your say on continuing to hold hands or intimate because “guys” in general just take advantage we wouldn’t know if they like it or not. They may take advantage, they might also wish the same thing that it could be more or they just don’t want to hurt the girls feelings. To Summarize all its all up to the girl. Can she handle bering intimate knowing that the guy may just be her good friend (at least she was able to take advantage of him)? Dba at least na enjoy nimu ang holding hands. Or is she just being intimate hoping nga something could happen?
Some are lucky that the guy they are falling for realizes. Some are not. Weigh it. If the guy is torpe then maybe time to give him a wake up call if the guy is not torpe then chances are he’s just passing time.

Upon reading this, it got me thinking. Maybe the intimacy is welcomed. Its always nice to have someone hold your hand just to let you know that they're just around the corner if you need them. Its nice to know that there's somebody who's willing to set aside whatever it is they're doing just to listen to you rant or listen to you praise all that had happened in your day. But then for me, its crossing the boundary of "just being close friends" and that certain "something else"!

And then another thought, probably way far from the topic at hand, hit me. I remembered Doyle telling me not to put color/meaning into what people especially guys do. Just wait till they guy blurts out the real deal. But lately it seems that even words are not to be taken seriously, well not all people but when it comes to guys I mean. They may say that they missed you and then mean something else. Ahhh! Why can't they just make up their minds. There are basically 2 choices here:

You like me. OR
You don't like me.

So I'd just probably stay away from guys. Period. End of story! hehehe...